{"id":680,"date":"2011-09-09T02:50:27","date_gmt":"2011-09-09T02:50:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/test.fromscarlet.com\/?p=680"},"modified":"2011-09-21T03:02:55","modified_gmt":"2011-09-21T03:02:55","slug":"no-more-daniels","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/test.fromscarlet.com\/?p=680","title":{"rendered":"No More Daniels…"},"content":{"rendered":"

This is a post taken from my wife Kimberly’s blog www.lovingtheleastofthese.com<\/a><\/p>\n

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Daniel age 13 with Daniel Josiah<\/p><\/div>\n

The reality of Daniel’s death took a few days to sink in.\u00a0 When I first heard through Facebook, that he had been shot, I was really hoping that it was just a rumor or something. But as I talked with my good friend from Newark on the phone the other day, the gruesome details of his brutal murder penetrated hard. Run down by two guys.\u00a0 Shot 22 times. It seems too painful to bear at times.<\/p>\n

Daniel was one of the first kids Danny met when he moved to Newark.\u00a0 Daniel then became attached to Danny’s hip.\u00a0 He was ALWAYS at Danny’s house, hanging out with him, eating dinner with him, being his right hand guy as Danny led worship and led many of the ministry endeavors of the church.\u00a0 It was almost annoying at times.\u00a0 When Danny and I were engaged and I would come up to visit, we’d spend the WHOLE day with the kids (Daniel was always there) and then I would look forward to sneaking away on a date where it could just be Danny and me for a couple of hours. Daniel inevitably always asked if he could come too. My soon-to-be husband showed “boundaries” and said “no” much to the relief of his eager soon-to-be-bride.<\/p>\n

Daniel loved the “Brick City Kid rap” that Danny had written for the kids. It presented a stark contrast of the street life we saw around us daily and the hope we have in Christ.\u00a0 Danny even recorded it with Daniel rapping it along with his cousin, Omar. They guys performed it for our Thanksgiving talent show and we prayed that its words would ring true in their lives and in the lives of all the street kids in Newark.\u00a0 We were proud of Daniel and had high hopes of him being the first of generations of kids who would grow up to live by the hope we have in Jesus instead of by the generational curses that pervade the streets and homes of our neighborhood.<\/p>\n

One day, pre-marriage, Danny and I went over to Daniel’s little apartment in the housing projects. His grandma, mom, aunts, brother, and cousins all lived in the little two bedroom place with roaches running rampant and the TV always blaring.\u00a0 He emerged from “his” room with a picture.\u00a0 There was a little two year old boy with a fro sitting on a large African American’s lap.\u00a0 “That’s me, and that’s my dad”, he pointed out to me.\u00a0 I asked him where his Dad was now, and a he mumbled “I dunno”.<\/p>\n

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Daniel at Young Life Camp (Lake Champion)<\/p><\/div>\n

When it was time for Danny and I to marry, Danny packed up his things, said many tearful goodbyes, and moved to Virginia so that I could finish my last year of college. That year was a turning point in Daniel’s life.\u00a0 The other kids who were in that initial “pack” always gave us saddening reports.\u00a0 “Daniel’s changed.”, “Daniel started smoking.”, “Daniel started hanging out with the wrong guys.”\u00a0 To tell you the truth, I wasn’t very surprised.\u00a0 Danny had been the most stable relationship in his life for the past year and the most positive influence he’d ever received, so with the huge void that his absence brought, I’m not surprised that Daniel started seeking “family” in the “pre-gang” relationships.\u00a0 At least there were older guys there.\u00a0 His home was full of women.<\/p>\n

When we returned to Newark, we tried to get Daniel back involved again.\u00a0 His presence would come in waves.\u00a0 Some weeks when mission teams were there, he practically never left the church building, but then other times there would be long spells when we didn’t see him.\u00a0 We’d always bend over backwards to make sure he went on different trips with us – paintballing, camps, mission trips.\u00a0 It even involved writing letters to parole officers to convince them to let him leave the state with us. (He’d already started getting in trouble with the law).<\/p>\n

So many cards were stacked against Daniel.\u00a0 From being put in front of a television from infancy (resulting in attention disorders and truncated brain development) to having no father or even father figure in his life until he was eleven and met Danny.\u00a0 From getting in trouble at school (because of his hyperactivity) to being literally on the streets all the time.\u00a0 He couldn’t read well, and dropped out of school early.\u00a0 His mom didn’t know what to do for him anymore and moved to another part of the city when he was about 15.\u00a0 His only future was earning a place on the streets with the Crips. or so it seemed when so many relationships have let you down.<\/p>\n

The last few years of knowing him, he seemed to be slipping away from us. Each time we saw him he looked more and more hardened by street life.\u00a0 But at the same time, when he’d spend time with our family each year on his birthday, we would see glimmers of the old Daniel.\u00a0 The radiant smile that lit up his face.\u00a0 The tenderness towards our kids.\u00a0 And the eagerness to be in Danny’s presence….the only man that had consistently loved him.<\/p>\n

This week a midst our weepiness and deep mourning (every time I break down-mid breakfast, mid-story time, mid-homeschooling, I get these “are you an alien?\u00a0 My mom doesn’t CRY?!” looks from my kids) Danny and I have thought long and hard over what we could have done differently.\u00a0 We should have been more firm about him getting tutoring in reading (but at the time we didn’t have anyone available who could).\u00a0 We should have chased him down and loved him enough to keep him out of the gangs (but Danny running a busy ministry and we had so many kids who were showing up, that it was hard to go hunt other ones down).\u00a0 We should have recruited more people to mentor one on one. (but people who didn’t live in Newark were busy with their own lives).\u00a0 We should have prayed more for his life. We should have done this. We should have done that.<\/p>\n

In this heart-wrenching week, I’ve cried out to God for two things. That Daniel’s death would not be in vain-that it would be a sobering warning for the other teens that we have invested in who are now wrestling with the pulls of street life.\u00a0 That they would truly see that “He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword” and that message of the Gospel that I KNOW they have heard from us would rise up in their Spirits and draw them into walking with God.\u00a0 The other thing I have been praying is that his death would stir up the people who don’t live in Newark, to recognize the great need for “go-ers” to uproot and go replant in the city.\u00a0 It may not even be in Newark.\u00a0 But there are Daniels on every inner city street in America.\u00a0 Daniels who need to be loved for who they are.\u00a0 Daniels that need someone to hope in them. Daniels who need an affirming male in their lives and a home away from home to retreat to so that they are not left to the ways of the streets.\u00a0 Daniels who need to hear the message of a Savior leaving Heaven itself to enter into “his” world to redeem him from it.\u00a0 And Daniels who need to SEE this happen, this incarnation, through people who claim Christ and are truly willing to walk as Christ walked.\u00a0 Out of the splendor of the suburbs and into the dirty, smelly streets of the “world”.<\/p>\n

I want to see<\/p>\n

No more Daniels.<\/p>\n

because someone SHOWED up<\/p>\n

and were beautiful feet,<\/p>\n

and loving arms,<\/p>\n

and encouraging lips<\/p>\n

so that there would be<\/p>\n

No more Daniels.<\/p>\n